Fred's Cake Outtakes And Missing Moments
by yellatthetopofyourlungs
Summary: Outtakes and missing moments from 'Fred's Cake'.


**A/N**

**Please note that this is outtake for my story Fred's Cake.**

**Thank you for reading as as with Fred's Cake all reviewers will revieve teaser lines for the next outtake :)**

**Also any ideas/recomendations for outtake/missing moments you would like are welcomed :)**

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**Emmett POV**

"Come on dude, you owe me for last year and that girl who was stalking you, just one date that is all you have to go on" He paused and I groaned out loud, it was true I did owe Ben for dealing with that girl last year, she was a total nut case "Come on Ang is gunna bust my balls if you say no!"

That was two nights ago and here I sat in the Ava Lounge restaurant awaiting this girl, who was called Amy… no that wasn't it….. Annie… no not that either.. _Hmmmm_…… ALICE! yes that was it.

So yea here I sit and its 8.17 according to my awesome watch that I won at the carnival the other night, that night was so much fun and when The waiter comes over and asks if I am ready to order I think screw it, I am hungry as hell and chances are this girl probably won't even eat so I might as well get a head start…right?

"Yea, you ready cause I am not repeating this!" I told him with raised eyebrows, he gave me a weak nod "Okay so I will start with the Fish platter with a side order of fries then a steak medium, I don't want any blood on my plate, with a side of onion rings, no, no make that extra onion rings and that creamy sauce stuff on the side it tastes so damn good and for dessert I will have a rocky rode, Large and a slice of Apple pie with custard and make sure its warmed up I hate it when its cold"

I looked up and saw the waiter who had this baby face that for some reason I really just wanted to hit, his name tag read 'Michael' _Loser_

He looked at me with wide eyes and mumbled "Anything else sir?"

"nope" I said popping the p at the end and he scurried away leaving me laughing, as quietly as I could.

I heard a commotion towards the entrance, and that's when I saw _her _a short, really short that she could totally be one of those dudes that ride those horses.. Jockey's yea she could totally be one of them!

I pitied the poor guy who she was eating with her and turned my attention back to the Free breadsticks on my table until the _real _food came.

As I took a bite I looked up to see the jockey girl stood in front of me staring at my……shirt?

"Can I help you?" I asked in a irritated voice

"Your Emmett right?" she quizzed looking me up and down with an expression of something I couldn't place.

"Alice?" I asked and internally groaned and she nodded her head slowly and took a seat grabbing the menu and looking at it with such interest I thought that this date might actually be a success but when she made her order to Michael all she ordered was a small spaghetti bolognaise, _not bad jockey not bad but what about the starter and desserts?_

"Do you work out? Stupid question of course you do! But you look like you could snap this table in half with like no effort, oh my god you should totally be on that wrestling programme….. What's it called?" oh my fucking god this girl could talk, my head was hurting and when my starter came I grabbed it and started shovelling it in my mouth as she went on and on about how she was doing fashion and she went on and on and on about clothes and seasons and shit, she was totally reminding me of Jazz when he went on and on and freaking on about 'The Civil War' and I couldn't help but chuckle those two should totally have a talk off and see who could go on the longest, my money was on jockey!

I had to do something because her voice was going to be permanently burnt into my brain at this rate and the pitch of it… I don't know it was like one of those dog whistles or something and I couldn't help but laugh, apparently I did it loudly.

"What are you laughing at?" she quizzed as she took a sip of some fruity thing she had ordered.

"About your voice, like a dog whistle" she starred at me open mouthed for about 3 whole minutes and I swear my balls started to retreat inside of me, there was just something so disturbing about the way she squinted her eyes, and I swear it was as though they were starting to glow red…_wtf_.

She muttered something and then took another swig of her drink still giving me the stink eye.

Okay I need to fix this……come on think Emmett think………. jokes!

"Okay" I said "Why did god create Adam before he created eve?"

"huh?" she just stared at me

"Because he didn't want anyone telling him how to make Adam." and I burst out laughing, man I crack myself up!

Looking back at the jockey pixie to see she was not looking in my direction at all but was now swirling her fork in her spaghetti, I shrugged and started eating my steak.

"What did the banana say to the vibrator?" I asked her hoping that this would make her laugh "Why are you shaking she's going to eat me." she chocked on a mouth full of food and started downing her water.

"what is wrong with you?" he asked once she could breath normally again "Are you retarded? Raised by wolves? Used as crack currency?"

"woooooaaaaahhhhh there pixie calm down, it was just a joke!" I said raising my hands as people around us started staring.

In response she just mmmmmmm'd and looked back down at her food, I looked down at my own empty plate and wondered when my desserts where coming, I was hungry man!

I looked over at Michael and signalled I wanted my food and glanced down at my shirt when he came over and took my empty plate "I may not be Fred Flintstone baby but I can make your bedrock" and winked at her but she still didn't laugh, what is wrong with this girl its almost like she was immune to Emmett's awesomeness, _what the hell._

She took a deep breath and I leaned backwards as she sat up straight and pointed at my shirt "That is Barney Rubble not Fred Flintstone, and not in a million years would you be making my bedrock to get your Yuba dabba do's that is for sure" she crossed her arms.

"Now you wait don't pick on my shirt, and that was a good one. You asked what's wrong with me! What is wrong with you? Your like a Ice witch or a demon or something!"

"That is it!" she shouted, the entire restaurant went silent "You are errrrrrrrgg" next thing I know her plate, which was nearly full by the way, flew and landed on my head, all the other people started laughing as she stormed out, leaving me not only with food on my head but also with the bill for her food!

_Ben you owe me! _


End file.
